Keep Calm

Bloodshot eyes

2012-01-18T00:54:00.004+01:00

Don't pretend that you were left in the dark. Stop pretending that you had no idea. You knew. 'Cause when I looked into your eyes I saw understanding. But all that's lost. You said you would always understand. That promise is broken. You said you never wanted to hurt me. But you did. You really did. And it hurts bad. So please, let's just talk. Let me tell you that I'm disappointed, that she's not good enough for you, and that I'm the perfect match. Just let me tell you everything, so that I maybe finally can get some sort of closure. I can try to keep telling my head that I don't love you, but my heart knows better. I lie to make it bearable.

Loving you. I'm over it.

Fake a smile

2012-01-14T01:18:00.003+01:00

Everything

2012-01-10T01:14:00.007+01:00

Imagine for a minute, that you have a person in your life that is, in your eyes, perfect. Everything about this person make sense. You imagine your life together. You will complete each other in a perfect way. You'll be the golden couple. The couple everyone wants to be like, just because you're so damn happy. You love him more than anything in this world, and he loves you like there is no tomorrow. Yes, you have your disagreements, your ups and downs, but in the end, all that seems meaningless as long as you have each other.

Now imagine that you never can be with this person. You'll never be with the person that is the one that, in your head, defines you. So what are you left with? A torn, broken, lost and unrecognizable version of yourself. A self-destructive version that can love no other person, because that doesn't make sense. A version who puts her life on hold, because this life without him, doesn't feel worth living. And it may seem dramatic, but in your mind it makes so much sense. He is everything. He is all you want. All you need.

The urge is stronger than it has been for years. This old, familiar feeling is creeping up on you, and you feel weak. You want to hurt, but you know you have to fight it if you ever want to get rid of this habit, that slowly is destroying you. You'll try your very best to be strong, but changes like this makes your day a struggle. So you'll fight...for you. Don't ever think it's for him. 'Cause if you let him take over another part of you, then soon there will be none of you left. You imagine the pain, and for a second you feel at peace. But when you think back on the days where this feeling where an everyday obsession, you know it's not worth it. Not even for a minute of calmness.

So here you are. The girl everyone thought were so strong. You're weak. So weak. You broke. But you'll build you up again. Just wait and see. You'll surprise everyone. And he won't even know what hit him. Just wait and see.

Don't

2012-01-09T18:33:00.005+01:00

Please don't do this. Don't move on just yet. Give me another chance. Please. I'm desperate. My heart can't take it. I'm falling, and if you're not the one who catches me, then no one will. You are the only one who can save me. So do. You promised. Let me prove to you that we can be happy. Let me prove that I can change. Mold me in whatever way you want. I'll be everything you want. I'll be better than the others. I'll be closer to perfect then you ever thought was possible. 'Cause if you choose to move on without me, then I promise that you will regret it. I will make you regret it. I will do anything in my power to remind you of what could have been. What should have been. You will hurt just as much as I am hurting.

2012

2012-01-02T00:25:00.002+01:00

Let this be the year. The year where my troubles shrink, joys grow and miracles happen. Let this be the year that I reach my goals, and adjust my dreams so that they actually can be reached. Let me forget the people that holds me down, and love the people who lifts me up. Let me be the best I can be.

Ph: http://weheartit.com/entry/20209259/via/2cute4school

Hurt

2011-12-26T00:45:00.004+01:00

You may not be her first, her last, or her only

She loved before, she may love again

But if she loves now, what else matters?

She's not perfect - you aren't either, and the

two of you may never be perfect together

but if she can make you laugh, cause you to

think twice, and admit to being human and

making mistakes, hold onto her and give

her the most you can. She may not be

thinking of you every second of the day,

but she will give you a part of her that she

knows you can break - her heart. So don't

hurt her, don't change her, don't analyze and

don't expect more than she can give.

Smile when she makes you happy, let her

know when she makes you mad, and

miss her when she's not there.

ph: http://weheartit.com/entry/17958887/via/2cute4school

Enough, Enough now

2011-12-21T11:29:00.003+01:00

At first, everything was nice. We were both naive. Young. Dumb. Then I started to play games, and you played along. The difference between you and I; I didn't use any dirty tricks. Because when you saw me at my weakest, you put your foot out and made me trip. So I fell, further and further down. And now I can't get up. My feet have no strength. I try to rise, but they give in. So I scream silently for help. Begging someone to help me up. But all I see is bystanders. They see me but won't help. They see me, but not the pain. They can't see that my legs are broken. So this is the punishment for wearing my heart on my sleeve. The punishment for playing the game too far.

So I'll just lay here. Helpless, tucking my heart in so it won't show on my sleeve, thinking; Enough, Enough now.

ph: http://weheartit.com/entry/19348802/via/2cute4school

Dear Miss Karen

2011-12-02T21:50:00.005+01:00

I'm in desperately need of some sun. In these stressful, depressing, rainy and cold exam days, it would be oh so wonderful to feel some rays of sun, even if their artificial. So please, make my little christmas wish come true, and I will for sure send you some telepathic sunlight.

Check out the lovely Miss Karen's blogg here

Ph: weheartit.com

Butterflies

2011-11-29T23:48:00.004+01:00

Lately when I look into your eyes I realize

You're the only one I need in my life

Baby I just don't know how to describe

How lovely you made me feel inside

You give me butterflyz

Got me flying so high in the sky I can't control the butterflyz

You give me butterflyz

Got me flying so high in the sky

I can't control the butterflyz

It seems like the likely thing

From the start you told me I would be your queen

But never had I imagined such a feeling

Joy is what you bring

I want to give you everything

You give me butterflyz

Got me flying so high in the sky

I can't control the butterflyz

ph: weheartit.com

Important

2011-11-23T22:33:00.003+01:00

This feeling is eating me up from the inside. I ask myself why I'm suddenly this nervous. Why now, why this? Because I have something to prove. It's not easy not ever being good enough. Always having to prove that I can be good as well. So just stop being this judgemental. Stop giving me that disappointed look. I will be OK. I will make it. Trust me. Some day, you will look up at me and think; "She really did it". And I did it without any help. I never asked for anything. I don't want to lean on others. I need to believe in me, before anyone else can.

So why nervous now? 'Cause this actually mean something to me. This is my chance.

ph: weheartit.com

It's Ok not to be Ok

2011-11-21T00:37:00.003+01:00

Ripping up in old emotions is cruel to oneself. Torture. Memories drain you, tears start streaming, and there is no off switch. I wish I was some kind of an immortal creature with no emotions. I wish I could just lose my memory. They say you need to hurt to be able to love, but I would never have guessed that it took this kind of pain. 'Cause this is a wrenching, addict in rehab, wanna scream at the top of my lungs, crawl together like a ball, never wake up kind of pain. And the worst part is when this insane pain turns into rage. A rage I never thought I had in me. I want you to feel my pain too. I don't deserve to be alone in this agony. You need to feel it to, and then maybe you too will be able to love. Maybe able to love me. But it seem like you're incapable of loving, or hurting, so for now I'll run. Run from the pain and rage. Run 'till there is no more love.

ph: weheartit.com

You Say Coincidence, I Say Sign

2011-11-07T23:44:00.003+01:00

When there is so many coincidences that it's starting to get a bit scary, shall we still continue to deny what is so clear? Shall we continue to wrap signs in coincidences? The universe are telling us something. So let's embrace it, cherish it, and follow the signs. But if you're still not convinced, then what does this mean for me? Am I still on my own, still trying to win you over then? Hell no. I'm done doing that. So is this just some test? Is the universe testing me to see how long it will take before I break down in a hysteric panic attack. How many "signs" it will take to turn me crazy? I'm already crazy, at least thats what you told me. I'm crazy in everything I do. But the important factor is that I call it devoted and dedicated. So this is as crazy as it gets. But I guess I'm not broken. Yet.

ph: http://www.photoblog.pl/czarcikowa/105569155

L.O.V.E

2011-11-05T00:51:00.003+01:00

Finally done thinking, daydreaming, fantasizing of a life that never would be a reality. Feeling good, feeling at peace with it all. Then, in a dream, you came to me. And it feels so stupid that a silly dream can change it all, again. Finding myself looking at pictures, thinking of memories and feeling jealous of those who are in your life. Wishing I was still in your life. I see yo listening to my songs, and I can't helping thinking that you don't have the right to. Those are my songs, the songs that helped me through the darkest days, when you hurt me like no boy has ever hurt me. I wish I had the courage to come up to you and say:

You don't get to smile at me!

You don't get to talk to me!

You don't get to talk to my friends!

You don't get to listen to my music!

And you certainly don't get to look at me like nothing has happened!

Stay away.

(Or please just come back.)

When Life Is Good, I'ts Good!

2011-10-30T23:30:00.002+01:00

Yellow Diamonds

2011-10-23T14:38:00.004+02:00

I saw you screamin'

And no one can hear

You almost feel ashamed

That someone can be that important,

That without them you feel like nothin'

No one will ever understand how much it hurts

You feel hopeless

Like nothin' can save you

But when its over, and it's gone

You almost wish that you could have all that bad stuff back

So that you could have the good

Sunday blues

2011-10-16T19:15:00.002+02:00

Success

2011-10-06T22:23:00.005+02:00

What was that? You're tired? Of life being unfair, cold, hard and tiring? So what are you gonna do about it? Are you gonna dig a hole and dig it deep, so that you can hide? Are you going under the surface, avoiding looking the truth in the eyes? Is the eyes to honest? Is the truth to real? So you are giving up. You are locking the door to your future. Because you're scared? Of what? Success? Maybe actually making it this time? Maybe it takes a little strength, and maybe you for once need to actually finish something. Oh, so its sounds stressful and exhausting? Yeah, it is! You will be tired like you never been tired before. You will cry, for days. You will almost give up, and you might not succeed. So then you give up? No, you never fucking give up. If you don't succeed you try again.

You try again.

Lemons

2011-10-02T17:16:00.003+02:00

When life give you so many lemons, that you have too many to make lemonade out of them all, what do you do? When life is too cruel, too unfair and too confusing, what do you do? And when you have to explain this cruelty to a child, what do you say? Do you have an explanation to why life take away those we love, make those we care about sick, and destroy our faith in humanity one lemon at the time? The hard and cold truth is that there is no explanation. So we try to make the lemonade faster and faster, so that the children's innocence don't get taken away. But when it suddenly does, thats when life is at its cruelest. That's when the adults have to lock up their own heart wrenching sadness, and tell how lemons make us stronger, even though they don't really believe it themselves.

Dumb

2011-09-27T21:50:00.005+02:00

When you kissed my cheek, I should've known. When you kissed my forehead, I should've known. When you said you'd always understand, but then you didn't pull through. I should've known.

Playlist

2011-09-24T01:08:00.004+02:00

You know when you're listening to music on your ipod? You're kind off tired off your playlists so you play "All songs" to see if there some good ones that you have forgot about. You listen to some songs, and suddenly this song starts to play. It's the song. Emotions starts flowing through your body. Not sure if they are good or bad, but they hurt. Bad. It's the one songs that has a thousand memories. So there you are, crying, remembering, trying hard to forget. But this song won't let you. This song will forever remind you about these moments in your life when you were so happy, at the same time so sad, and so frustrated and confused. The song hits you like a punch in the stomach. This song bruises and scars you. You're considering skipping to next, but something is holding you back. Maybe the memories, maybe the pain.

Obsessed

2011-09-18T01:53:00.002+02:00

My thoughts keep running. Have I done something wrong? Feels like I'm doing something illegal. But I'm obsessed. I can't help it. I'm sorry...

You ignore it. Tired of my games. And I understand. I would be tired of me as well. I'm so tired.

You don't look at me anymore. You just see right past me, and thats when it hurts the most. Thats when I realize that it's probably over. But you know me. I won't give up. I fight.

It's so old. These thoughts, dreams, nightmares. You need to let me go, and I need to let go of this never ending impossible mission. It's no longer a story with a possibly happy ending. It's self harm. It's an obsession.

I just gave up.

B.S.

2011-08-31T00:38:00.004+02:00

This...this is not okay! You, treating me like shit, not okay. You pretending like nothing is going on, like everything is okay. Things are definitly not okay. Things are fucked up. And don't you dare pretend like there is nothing here, like I'm being foolish. Stop looking at me like I'm the idiot, when you're the one with a problem. Just stand up, be a man, and tell it like it is. I'm so done with this bullshit.

FUCK YOU AND FUCK HER TOO

2011-08-21T00:19:00.003+02:00

Just....stay away.

Sunday

2011-08-14T23:05:00.005+02:00

So here I am, again. Promised myself that I would never be back here, but aren't promises meant to be broken? It's Sunday. Me and Sundays have never cooperated well. That's the day I start to think, and reflect over the things that have happened lately. So what have I done? I have prevented myself from being happy, sabotaged myself, made myself cry. So there you go. This is Sunday. Filled with thoughts and tears, and confusement. And this time, I'm the one who is confusing me, no one else. I'm realizing that I'm crazy. I need to stop standing in my own way, in the way of my own happiness.

'Cause this just can't be called living.

22.07.11

2011-07-24T01:31:00.003+02:00

The day our nation lost to the war of terror. The day when hopes and dreams were ripped apart. An action that can't even be described in words. Words are too small, for such a big, big disaster. The place that we call home, and thought no one could touch, have been hated on. Disagreement have led to hate, that have led to ignorance, that have led to actions of terror. And what I think is most awful about this, is that this will only lead to more hate. Hate breed hate. We are all wounded and hurt, some more than others, and we all feel the hate.

So let's try not to be controlled by the hate, because then, terror has won. Let's rise and show the world, that we might be small, but we are brave. We have 92 heroes, that has put a whole new meaning to the word brave. So let their memory never be forgotten, and let the all the survivors know that they are so loved and so cherished. This is the time when we need to put hate aside, hold hands, spread the love and share our fears. That way we will rise again, and be the nation we know we are.

Foto: bt.no

Best Thing I Never Had

2011-07-11T23:12:00.003+02:00

I just realized that you're not the only one for me. You're not the only one with big blue eyes and a big bright smile. I'm so done. I done waiting pathetically by the phone, done looking like an idiot when I say "he'll call", but then you never do. I'm over being kept on a pedestal, and over being treated like I'm not special. 'Cause I'm special. You'll be lucky to be as special as I am.

I long for the day when you suddenly remember what you never had, but miss. I long for the day when you see me with that person that treats me like a princess. And I long the most for the day when you call me, and I pick up the phone, and I tell you about my fantastic life that don't include you. You will, eventually, be the best thing I never had.

I'm not finding anyone like you

2011-06-23T01:00:00.001+02:00

I tell myself that there are more fish in the sea. That behind the clouds, there is sun. That in the end, it will be OK. That I will get over you. That I will find someone else like you.

I sometimes wish I hadn't met you. Then there would be no need to impress you. No need to want you. No need for loving you. No need for crying over you. No need for a broken heart. No need for pain or tears. No need for forgotten promises. No need for everything you've done for making me feel like absolutely nothing.

I just wish you would hold me when I'm here. Right me when I'm wrong. Hold me when I'm scared and love me when I'm gone.

I wish I hadn't told you.

Happy Birthday To Me!

2011-06-13T01:40:00.002+02:00

Forgotten

2011-06-08T18:57:00.004+02:00

I often think that people I stop keeping in touch with, stop living their lives. Off course I know that they are alive. But I'm that self absorbed, that I actually do believe that when I'm not any longer in a persons life, their life just goes on hold. But apparently they continue living. And when I realize this, it shocks me every time. People live their lives, without me in it. Have babies. Grow up. Get engaged. Move far away. Forget about me.

I guess its time I start living my life as well.

It's like...

2011-06-03T01:22:00.003+02:00

I was like:

But you were like:

Then I was like:

But then you looked at me like:

And then I couldn't look at you anymore, like:

2011-05-24T23:13:00.001+02:00

I always said I'd be happier alone

2011-05-22T18:09:00.002+02:00

Apparently I got over it.

But there is a reason I said I'd be happier alone. It wasn't 'cause I thought I'd be happy alone.

It was because I though if I loved someone, and then if it fell apart, I might not make it.

Its easier to be alone. Because what if you learn that you need love, and then you don't have it. What if you like it, and lean on it. What if you shake your life around it, and then it falls apart.

Can you even survive that kind of pain? Loosing love is like organ damage. Its like dying. The only difference is that death ends. This, it could go on forever.

Cosmic Love

2011-05-18T15:26:00.003+02:00

A falling star fell from your heart and landed in my eyes
I screamed aloud, as it tore through them, and now it's left me blind

The stars, the moon, they have all been blown out
You left me in the dark
No dawn, no day, I'm always in this twilight
In the shadow of your heart

And in the dark, I can hear your heartbeat
I tried to find the sound
But then, it stopped, and I was in the darkness,
So darkness I became

I took the stars from my eyes, and then I made a map
And knew that somehow I could find my way back
Then I heard your heart beating, you were in the darkness too
So I stayed in the darkness with you

The stars, the moon, they have all been blown out
You left me in the dark
No dawn, no day, I'm always in this twilight
In the shadow of your heart

Why, you asked?

2011-05-16T00:21:00.003+02:00

...Because you let me have your jacket when I was cold

...Because you played my favorite song

...Because you always ask if I'm OK

...Because you understand when I'm not OK

...Because you laugh at my jokes

...Because you like my friends

...Because you look at me in a "I Know" kind of way

...Because you know when to hug me, and when to stay away

...Because when I was weak I found strength in your eyes

...Because I really need you

...Because I really think you need me to

...Because I truly believe that you are different

...Because everyone says you're not

Don't Bother

2011-05-08T23:25:00.002+02:00

For you, I'd give up all I own

And move to a communist country
If you came with me, of course
And I'd file my nails so they don't hurt you
And lose those pounds, and learn about football
If it made you stay, but you won't, but you won't

Scares

2011-05-01T21:45:00.004+02:00

I keep thinking about us. When we first met. What we used to talk about. The music we used to listen to. The memories hurt. But they are like having the chickenpox. You're not suppose to scratch, but you just have to do it anyways. The memories of you are like itching, red sores. That can't be a good thing. And I scratch 'em and I scratch 'em, until they start to bleed. Thats when they hurts the most, but it's kind of a good hurt, 'cause at least then the itching stops for a moment. But then there's the downside with scratching oneself to blood. It leaves a scar. And the scares never leave. You're stuck with them forever, and they will always remind you of those chickenpox, that you couldn't keep your hands off, but had to scratch.

She lost control

2011-04-25T19:26:00.005+02:00

I suddenly realized, I haven't thought much about you lately. I haven't cried over you that many times lately either. That scares me. You don' t deserve me, but still, I don't want to let you go. It scares me that I'm starting to letting you go. I don't talk about you as much. I don't dream about you anymore. I'm starting to panic. Is this the universe telling me it's time to move on. I'm not ready for that. I don't want to let go. I want to hold on tighter then ever. I want to hold on so tight that you suddenly realize that you think of me more then you used to. Suddenly the tables are turning. You realize that you want me in your life. You remember the things we did. I'm starting to forget. Your face, its starting to get blurry. It's been a long time since I've seen you. Apparently it's been too long. If I don't get to feel you arms around me anytime soon, then I don't know what to do. They tell me to let go of you, and let go of all the pain. But I'm not holding on to all the pain you caused, I'm holding on to the little happiness you gave.

And here comes the tears...

Still hopeful

2011-04-20T00:18:00.004+02:00

Just imagine, for a minute, how you would feel if you knew you couldn't have the one thing you wanted the most in the whole world. Now imagine having to deal with that feeling everyday. Dealing with the voices in your head thats saying that you can't have it because you aren't pretty enough, smart enough, skinny enough, cool enough, tough enough. All day is spent trying to calm the voices. It usually doesn't work. And then you see him. The one you're working to get. And it hits you like a baseball-bat in the face. The voices gets louder along with the insecurity. You don't want to be around people. You don't want to go out, in case he will see you, and you can't meet him looking like this. So you're trying to improve yourself, but it doesn't really help.

So much pain for something so...small. And your friends ask you if its worth it. So much pain for a dream that might never come true. But what if it does?

I used to be fun

2011-04-15T00:14:00.002+02:00

Because sometimes people actually do feel that way. Sometimes your life feels like it's caving in on you. Sometimes people really do feel like they don't want to exist, like they just want to curl up in a ball, and go into a place between life and death. Saying "I don't want to exist", isn't saying "I want to die". It's saying, "I wish, for the time being, I could go somewhere and not have to feel". I don't think there is anything wrong with that. And if you don't know how it feels to feel this way, then you have no place to judge the people that do.

Now I got you, got you

2011-04-03T23:59:00.002+02:00

AMAZING

2011-04-01T18:17:00.000+02:00

Trust is like a mirror

2011-03-30T21:36:00.010+02:00

I avoid mirrors. Not because of my general reflection, but because of my eyes. I don't want to see the two black holes that stares back at me. They are tired. You are like my mirror. I don't want to look at you, and you don't want to look into my darkness. When I told you my problems, I didn't do it to complain. I told you, because I trusted you.

I'm just tired. Tired of waking up to the same routine everyday, seeing the same people, it's getting old. I'm tired of waking up alone, cold and insecure. Pushing myself to get out of bed. I'm just tired. That's my excuse.

Never Mind

2011-03-28T23:51:00.003+02:00

I heard that you're settled down,
That you found a girl and you're married now,
I heard that your dreams came true,
Guess she gave you things I didn't give to you,
Old friend, why are you so shy?
Ain't like you to hold back or hide from the light,

I hate to turn up out of the blue uninvited,
But I couldn't stay away, I couldn't fight it,
I had hoped you'd see my face,
And that you'd be reminded that for me it isn't over,

Nevermind, I'll find someone like you,
I wish nothing but the best for you, too,
Don't forget me, I beg,
I remember you said,
"Sometimes it lasts in love,
But sometimes it hurts instead,"
Sometimes it lasts in love,
But sometimes it hurts instead, yeah,

You know how the time flies,
Only yesterday was the time of our lives,
We were born and raised in a summer haze,
Bound by the surprise of our glory days,

Nothing compares,
No worries or cares,
Regrets and mistakes, they're memories made,
Who would have known how bittersweet this would taste?

Nevermind, I'll find someone like you,
I wish nothing but the best for you,
Don't forget me, I beg,
I remember you said,
"Sometimes it lasts in love,
But sometimes it hurts instead,"

You said you hated me, in my dreams last night. It almost killed me.

2011-03-20T23:27:00.004+01:00

ATHAZAGORAPHOBIA

2011-03-14T22:59:00.005+01:00

She's standing on a line between giving up and seeing how much more she can take.

He isn't coming back.

You'll never realise how strong you are until you have no other choice but to be strong.

I will forget you...eventually

You're gonna catch a cold

2011-03-05T15:45:00.004+01:00

I've been dreaming of the past. It hurts. Bad. Old memories hurt. They should be memories of joy, but you have ruined them. Your ignorance, your lies, you not being aware that you have ruined them, that hurts. So I dream, because there are no other way I could see it happen.

In the dreams, we are perfect. We still have obstacles, but we have each other, so it's still perfect. But in real life we don't have each other, so all I see are obstacles. But I will get over them. Not for you. But for me. 'Cause obstacles are just those frightful things you see when you take your eyes of your goal.

So I need to change my focus. Priorities my goals and dreams. Get back on track, and stop feeling bad for myself. Stop making myself vulnerable. And I just hope, that one of these days, you won't be on the the top of my list of dreams.

And So It All Fell Apart

2011-03-02T14:41:00.003+01:00

The End

2011-02-27T21:41:00.002+01:00

Such A Misfit Little Girl
Afraid Of Love She Hides Away
She's Stumbling Trough Life
In A Misfit Shitty World
She Makes It Trough Each Rainy Day
Searching For Light

She's Lost Out At Sea
It's Not Meant To Be

Oh, It's So Bittersweet
He's So In Too Deep
He Can't Have The One Who
Makes Him Complete
But That's How It Goes
It's Ok Cos He Knows
She Did What She Could
And Baby It's All Good

Such A Left Out Little Kid
Learning Love The Way He Did
His Smile's Not Real
Lives His Life Based On A Lie
He Watches His Time Passing By
He Gave It All To Her

Now His Days Have Turned Into Grey
She Keeps Her Smile Though He Feels This Way
Falling From Grace
This Is The End

Heartbreaker

2011-02-21T00:44:00.005+01:00

You and me are kind of similar. Like two drops of water. I sometimes play this song, that you used to play me, so I can look back and smile. Do you still remember? I used to be blind, but now i see what you see. I wear a ring. It says that you are my heartbreaker. I wonder if you can see me now. Are you out there? If I send you my thoughts, do you hear them? Seconds and minutes goes by, and they turn into months and years. Maybe you dont exist anymore. Maybe there is hope. I wait for the day when you kneel down, and I am on my toes.
Maybe you're just a heartbreaker.

Here's to new beginnings

2011-02-18T00:17:00.004+01:00

Pain doesn't tell you when you ought to stop. Pain is the little voice in your head that tries to hold you back because it knows, if you continue, you will change. Don't let it stop you from being who you can be. Exhaustion tells you when you ought to stop. You only reach your limit when you can go no further.

Fly

2011-02-14T20:10:00.004+01:00

I wish today it will rain all day, maybe that will kinda make the pain go away. Trying to forgive you for abandoning me, praying but I think I'm still an angel away.
Away, yeah strange in a way, maybe that is why I chase strangers away.
They got their guns out aiming at me, but I become near when they aiming at me.
Me, me, me against them, me against enemies, me against friends. Somehow they both seem to become one. A sea full of sharks and they all smell blood.
They start coming and I start rising must be surprising, I'm just summising.
I win, thrive, soar, higher, higher, higher more fire.

Everybody wanna try to box me in, suffocating everytime it locks me in.
Paint they own pictures than they crop me in, but I will remain where the top begins.
Cause I am not a word, I am not a line, I am not a girl that can ever be defined.
I am not fly, I am levitation I represent an entire generation. I hear the criticism loud and clear that is how I know that the time is near.
So we become alive in a time of fear, and I aint got no muthaf-cking time to spare.
Cry my eyes out for days upon days, such a heavy burden placed upon me,but when you go hard your nay's become yays.

Summer

2011-02-07T00:54:00.004+01:00

Longing for those carefree days

Longing for those endless nights

Longing for that summerfling

Longing for those days when problems doesn't mean anything

Just Fall

2011-02-06T02:06:00.006+01:00

Everytime she smiles she hopes he's watching.

Not so that he sees she's happy, but that maybe, just maybe,

He'll fall for her smile, just as hard as she fell for his.

In Hiding

2011-02-01T14:29:00.004+01:00

I don't show people how I feel; I bottle everything up inside until I snap. The truth that I don't tell people is that in all honesty I am torn, I am broken, I just carry myself well and hide it. I don't want to be one of those people who are constantly complaining about how much their life sucks or how they want to die. Unlike those people I will not seek your attention, I will not ask for your help, I'd rather walk through life alone than become like that. I will tell you everything is just fine when it's not. I'll listen to your problems even though I have plenty of my own. I will never show anybody who it is I really am.

Tears and Rain

2011-01-30T23:57:00.006+01:00

The girl who seemed unbreakable, broke.

The girl who always laughed, cried.

The girl that never stopped trying, finally gave up.

She dropped her fake smile, as a tear rolled down her cheek, and she whispered to herself, "I can't do this anymore".

3 Words, 8 Letters

2011-01-26T00:40:00.005+01:00

I don't think it's normal to be this sad, just because I miss you.

I know I'm repeating myself, but it's just so hard to never be good enough. You're draining me.
I try to tell myself to not care, but my heart keeps telling me that I do. I care! I care in a desperate, needy, disgusting, clingy, helplessly in love with you way. I pretend that I can forget you. But I'm not kidding anyone. And my question is; Will I ever feel that alive again? 'Cause I truly feel like I'm on autopilot. I just want you to knock down these walls that I have used my entire life to build. Knock 'em down. Find me. Help me see that I am better than this. I shouldn't be chasing you. You would be lucky to have me. Take this chance, 'cause I can't do this again. I can't say yes again. My heart can't take it. I may seem strong, but the truth is that I'm tired of being strong. I have realised that it is OK to be sad, it's OK to be depressed. Depressed is not a sign of weakness, it just means I have been strong for too long. But what's not OK, is that you are the reason why I'm so fucked up. Unintentionally, you have screwed me over, knocked me down, made me insecure, made me feel unworthy.
I know, deep inside, that I'm better than this. I'm just a strong girl who keeps stuff in line, even when I have tears going down my face, I still manage to say those two words - I'm fine.

So what if this time I don't say hi first. What if this time I don't text you back. What if this time I leave you wondering.
Yeah, what if this time your the one left completely fucked over?

I Fucking Miss You

2011-01-20T23:34:00.003+01:00

I dreamt of you last night. An amazing dream, were everything was how it should be. To wake up, getting out of bed, was a struggle. It's so hard. Capital H. Being further away from you makes me miss you even more. And I didn't think that was possible.

I'm trying to live my life without you. I'm smiling, but I'm dying, trying not to drag my feet. I try to kill the feeling but in the end, nothing helps. I'm so freakin' tired. I sleep but I don't feel rested. I laugh, but you are always at the back of my mind. Some part of me hopes that when you see how much I'm hurting you will come for me.

The truth, the thing we have has changed. That night changed it, and I know it. You told me it was OK, you said it wouldn't change anything. You made me believe that you were on my side, like you have done before. Is it once again empty words?
I felt you feel my pain, I thought. But if you can't accept that side of me, you can't accept me. And that is my biggest fear.

Oh come all ye faithful

2011-01-11T17:53:00.003+01:00

"I need a sign. You told me to have faith, but I'm kind of loosing mine, so...I need a sign. Just tell me I'm the one. You don't have to tell your mother, or the whole world, just tell me.
I can't do this. I love you, but I can't".

After he left I cried for a week, and then I realised, that I do have faith. Faith in myself. Faith in that I would one day meet someone, who would be sure, that I was the one.

Just let me cry

2011-01-04T15:09:00.002+01:00

I Just Want To Be Happy

2011-01-03T15:25:00.005+01:00

Darling, I really can't do this anymore. And this is probably the hundred time I'm saying this. But this time I mean it. At least, I really want to mean it this time.

You are holding me back. Thinking of you, I smile about what we've been through, and cry because you aren't here with me. Because of you I daydream all day, every day. Because of you, my playlists consist of songs that all remind me of you, and it hurts so bad to listen to them. But I can't help it! It's pain to listen to them, but it causes me even more pain to avoid them.

Because of you I measure every boy I meet up against you. And everyone comes short. At this point, I can't imagine a life without you. I don't want to have a life without you in it. But at the same time, what if I never get over you?

Hearing your name and seeing pictures of you, it hurts. Everything hurts. Looking in to your eyes, seeing your smile, hearing you talk. You have even taken over my dreams.

They all say I need to get over you, but what if I'm not ready. What if I never will. Why can't I just get what i want. Just this once. 'Cause all I want is to be happy. And darling, you're holding be back.

?

2010-12-25T23:54:00.003+01:00

I'm just a girl

Standing in front of a boy

Asking him to love her

Not Drunk Enough

2010-12-23T00:30:00.002+01:00

Never been a girl who used to cry
Didn`t show emotions, don`t know why
Didn`t wanna feel the pain inside, I guess

But as the years keep going by,
you came along and changed my mind
I should leave the past behind me,
I should let you find me,
supposed to stay beside me
You were supposed to guide me,
through the ups and downs,
you were always gonna be around until the end

I still think we could
`cause you and me, we`re good
And I`ll tell you why this hurts, 'cause I`m sober

But I just wanna be drunk
so I can forget about you
and all the stupid things that love has pulled me through
Even when I've had too much,
I still feel your touch
Maybe this just means that I`m not drunk enough

So I`m gonna get myself another drink
whenever I start to think about you
`cause I do what I really don`t want to
but sometimes my dreams just come through

And when I get there,
to a place where I see you in a kitchen
I stop wishing but that thing and I don`t need you,
I don`t really wanna see you
and I don`t want you to see me,
you would think that I was crazy,
you might think that I wanna be close to you
but I`d rather wanna drink some Whisky
and maybe have a little sip `o wine
`cause right now it`s the only thing that makes me forget you are mine
but right now I am sober

But I just wanna be drunk
so I can forget about you
and all the stupid things that love has pulled me through
Even when I've had too much,
I still feel your touch
Maybe this just means that I`m not drunk enough

2010-12-20T00:51:00.000+01:00

Just Stop This Pain

2010-12-20T00:21:00.002+01:00

Sometimes I feel like I'm not as strong as I thought I was. Sometimes I want to just vanish and never have to feel a thing.

This is not fair. Nothing is.

Feeling heartbroken all the time.....Sucks.

Still trying to get over being hurt after all this time....Stupid.

It's just another sleepless night. Weird things happen these days.

...

2010-12-06T21:00:00.004+01:00

I understand feeling as small and as insignificant as humanly possible. And how it can actually ache in places you didn’t know you had inside you. And it doesn’t matter how many new haircuts you get, or gyms you join, or how many glasses of chardonnay you drink with your girlfriends… you still go to bed every night going over every detail and wonder what you did wrong or how you could have misunderstood. And how in the hell for that brief moment you could think that you were that happy. And sometimes you can even convince yourself that he’ll see the light and show up at your door. And after all that, however long all that may be, you’ll go somewhere new. And you’ll meet people who make you feel worthwhile again. And little pieces of your soul will finally come back. And all that fuzzy stuff, those years of your life that you wasted, that will eventually begin to fade.

- The Holiday

2011

2010-12-05T22:33:00.004+01:00

In 2010, beauty is eyeliner,hair straighteners, mascara and hair gel. In 2010 you are pretty if you have a Northface, HCo skinnies and a pair of Uggs. In 2010 you pay $24.99 for a t-shirt just because it comes from an over-perfumed, dimy-lit store that plays music that gives you a migraine. In 2010 we are afraid to text him first, cause that would be "clingy". In 2010, we create all these silly excuses for ourselves. In 2010, we sit at home crying over a guy that doesn't care. In 2010, we hate, we lie, we backstab, we deceive, and we fight for all the wrong things. In 2010, we lie to our old friends, to impress our new ones. In 2010, we think twice and say "Why?". But you know what? Let's change all that. Let's try this all over again, in 2011.

Who Are You?

2010-11-30T13:49:00.003+01:00

You came to me in a dream. Your face looked familiar, but still unknown. You had those eyes. The most piercing blue eyes, I have ever seen. And in my dream when I ran out, in tears from all the pain, tired of everything that has consumed my thoughts for months and months, you stood there. You caught me. Looked at me. And let me fall into your arms. And I cried. You whispered that it all would be OK, someday.

You were so beautiful. Blond hair, blue eyes, big smile. Tall, muscular, exuding a friendliness like I haven't seen in any other human being. You made me feel like it was OK to cry, and OK to feel the way I felt. I have never felt so safe. You are the only person who has ever made me feel the way I felt when I lied in your arms, and just let the tears fall.

And now my mind is telling me that you're not real? You must be real. Maybe you're in disguise, but I will believe that you exist until I find you. And I will find you. I know I will! That is what keeping me going.
'Cause I'm not fine. And with you, I didn't have to pretend that I was.

Lies

2010-11-13T17:33:00.002+01:00

The average person tells 4 lies a day or 1460 a year; a total of 87600 by the age of 60. And the most common lie is: I'm fine.

I was wrong to think it would be easy with you. I was also wrong to think that I don't need you, and that if you love her, you should be with her. The fact is that I can't stand not being by your side, because without you I feel like there is no water in the ocean, no flowers in the woods, no nerds in the chemistry class. Which means that, without you, I don't feel myself. Actually, without you, I just don't feel at all. Because when you left, you took my feelings with you. And I'm still waiting for you to give them back.

But it's alright. I'm fine.

Hush Baby, Hush...

2010-11-11T17:37:00.002+01:00

On the first page of our story, the future seemed so bright.
And this thing turned out so evil, I don’t know why I’m still surprised.
Even angels have their wicked schemes and you take death to new extremes.
But you’ll always be my hero, even though you lost your mind.

Just gonna stand there and watch me burn,
But that’s alright because I like the way it hurts.
Just gonna stand there and hear me cry,
But that’s alright because I love the way you lie, I love the way you lie.
I love the way you lie.

Now this gravel in our voices, glass is shattered from the fight.
In this tug of war, you’ll always win, even when I’m right.
Cause you feed me fables from your hand,
With violet words and empty threats and it’s sick that all these battles are what keeps me satisfied.

So maybe I’m a masochist
I try to run but I don’t wanna ever leave.
Til the walls are goin’ up in smoke with all our memories.

This morning, you wake, a sunray hits your face
smeared makeup as we lay in the wake of destruction
hush baby, speak softly, tell me you’ll sorry that you
pushed me into the coffee table last night so I can push you off me
try and touch me so I can scream at you not to touch me
run out the room and I’ll follow you like a lost puppy
baby, without you, I’m nothing, I’m so lost, hug me
then tell me how ugly I am, but that you’ll always love me
then after that, shove me, in the aftermath of the
destructive path that we’re on, two psychopaths but we
know that no matter how many knives we put in each other’s backs
that we’ll have each other’s backs, ’cause we’re that lucky
together, we move mountains, let’s not make mountains out of molehills,
you hit me twice, yeah, but who’s countin’
I may have hit you three times, I’m startin’ to lose count
but together, we’ll live forever, we found the youth fountain
our love is crazy, we’re nuts, but I refused counselin’
this house is too huge, if you move out I’ll burn all two thousand
square feet of it to the ground, ain’t shit you can do about it
with you I’m in my f–kin’ mind, without you, I’m out it

Shaky

2010-11-08T01:37:00.004+01:00

You stood tall once; tall with strength and confidence and no matter how strong the wind was, it could never knock you over. You were so tall that no one could look into your eyes. You were so tall that you towered over buildings and trees and monuments. You never let anyone stand above you; no one could look down on you. You never let anyone get in your way. You're not quite as tall anymore though. Instead your small and low to the ground. Your strength is gone and confidence disappeared, and now when the wind blows, you fall over instantly. You're so small, so insignificant.

But you can lean on me all you want. I got my shoes tied all double knot. Leather like tongue against teeth. This is how I have managed to speak. Sometimes it feels so awful. Worse, you try and hide it. You don't want anyone to know that you're sad.

ENOUGH...enough

2010-11-08T01:29:00.002+01:00

There's too much pain

I'm Declaring War

2010-10-26T01:51:00.002+02:00

LIVE

2010-10-15T23:33:00.004+02:00

Look at you. You're young. And you're scared. Why are you so scared?
Stop being paralyzed. Stop swallowing your words. Stop caring what other people think.
Wear what you want. Say what you want. Listen to the music you want to listen to.
Play it loud as fuck and dance to it. Go out for a drive at midnight and forget you have school
the next day. Stop waiting for friday. Live now. Do it now. Take risks. Tell secrets.
This life is yours. When are you going to realize that you can do whatever you want?

Wall Stickers

2010-10-15T15:02:00.003+02:00

Source: mywallstickers.co.uk

Endless nights...

2010-10-10T03:38:00.003+02:00

I need to sleep. Seriously. I can't keep on lying here, all night, just thinking of you. You're not worth it, are you?
Where did you go? That night when I saw you, you clearly didn't see me. Not every time anyways. At first it seemed as you remembered. You played my favorite song, and when I looked at you as a way of saying "you do understand", you looked at me with your beautiful, big eyes and I knew you understood what my eyes where saying. We have always been like that. We don't need to talk, a stare is enough. You would just mimic the words "You OK?" if you thought I was having a hard time, and for me that was enough. But this night it was different. I had to fight for contact. And I'm done fighting.

You confused me that night. One minute you were talking about this girl, and the next you were telling stories to your friends about all our memories. When you told about that night in december when I lost my shoes, you smiled. And I knew by looking at you that these were good memories for you too. So why would you bring her up just to hurt me, and why didn't you see me that last time? Didn't you want to? With my eyes I was screaming for you to notice. For you to ask me if I was OK, 'cause I weren't .

What happened to us? What's wrong with me? How can you go from wanting more to wanting nothing. Or do you want something? I'm so damn confused, because your eyes won't tell me anything anymore. Please just tell me something. Should I wait?

I just want to be your favorite hello, and your hardest goodbye. Please.

And it still hurt with every heartbeat

2010-10-06T14:23:00.003+02:00

Med ena foten utanför

2010-10-03T12:34:00.002+02:00

Du ville träffa mig i veckan
det var nån dag som passade dig
du tog förgivet att jag kunde
men du glömde fråga mig
du glömde fråga mig

Du flyger högre än oss andra
man får se upp varenda gång
först när du tar dig ner på jorden
först då kan jag va din vän
först då kan jag va din vän

Jag mår bra och det blir vackert
och lika sorgset som förut
men här finns inga brustna hjärtan
alla ser likadana ut
alla ser likadana ut

Det är grönare i parken
och du ropar högt när du är där
du säger att jag skrämde bort dig
men du var ju aldrig här
du var ju aldrig här

Du går ensam hem från krogen
och jag undrar hur du gör
om det är lättare att falla
med ena foten utanför
med ena foten utanför

Du ville träffa mig i veckan
och du vill alltid samma sak
du vill ha det du förlorat
men mig får du inte tillbaks
mig får du inte tillbaks

Mig får du inte tillbaks.

You're taking too long Baby

2010-09-26T15:05:00.002+02:00

You mustn't be afraid to dream a little bigger darling

2010-09-17T13:58:00.002+02:00

Finds comfort in pain...

2010-09-06T23:13:00.002+02:00

I guess it's time I run.

And she wonders where these dreams go

2010-08-31T23:54:00.002+02:00

They painted up your secrets
With the lies they told to you
And the least they ever gave you
Was the most you ever knew

And I wonder where these dreams go
When the world gets in your way
What's the point in all this screaming
No one's listening anyway

Your voice is small and fading
And you hide in here unknown
And your mother loves your father
'Cause she's got nowhere to go

And she wonders where these dreams go
'Cause the world got in her way
What's the point in ever trying
Nothing's changing anyway

They press their lips against you
And you love the lies they say
And I tried so hard to reach you
But you're falling anyway

And you know I see right through you
When the world gets in your way
What's the point in all this screamin'
You're not listening anyway

You're My List Of Dreams

2010-08-19T01:58:00.003+02:00

When we are children we dream big. On our list of dreams, is becoming lions, superheroes and princesses. We pretend to be these things and we live out our dreams. Our days are almost carefree and everything is sunshine and cupcakes and fairy tales. As we grow a little older the fairy tales disappear. But we still have sunshine and cupcakes. Our dreams are more "realistic", and we trade superheroes for football players and princesses for pop stars. Our days just have minor problems like curfews and too short holidays.

As we move into the oh so wonderful teenage years our dreams reach a new high. Suddenly there is either sunshine or rain, no cloudy days. It's either or. We have lot's of problems. Who to hang out with, who to love, who to hate. And our dreamlist consists of getting boyfriends and girlfriends and first kisses. We still dream of being footballer players and pop stars, because it would be so incredibly awesome, and it would make us super popular.

At the end of our teens we are a little more down to earth. We dream of being doctors, lawyers and really just earning a lot of money. We still dream of girlfriends and boyfriends, and we still strive to be popular. There are more cloudy days, and for every sunny day, we have ten rainy ones.

When we move out of our teens, we start to accept the world for what it really is. Everyone can't be football players, pop stars, doctors and lawyers. And that is okay. We accept thats life is mostly cloudy days with some sun and some rain. It's unpredictable, and that's okay too. We see the greater problems in life, although we realize that the small problems are important too. And it's allowed to dream about fairy tales and cup cakes and first kisses. It's allowed to worry about life and love.

We should all have our own list of dreams. A list were we write down things that we want to accomplish. Realistically and unrealistically. And that list should be with you at all times, because it represents you as a person. And even though it sound childish, and even if it makes you feel fourteen again, it is allowed to say that "You are my list of dreams, you are my sunshine and you are my fairy tale". Everybody should be someones list of dreams.

Must Haves - Fall 2010

2010-08-09T15:28:00.004+02:00

Uggs - Classic short Chestnut

Bag - Marc By Marc Jacobs

Jacket - Zara

Wristlet - Marc by Marc Jacobs

Baby, You're not that lucky, and I'm not that desperate!

2010-08-08T23:19:00.003+02:00

I can't do this anymore! I can't keep on playing this cat and mouse game. I'm tired of chasing something that might never happen. But it's your fault. Don't give me promises you can't keep. Don't serve me lines you don't mean. Don't let me feel like a fool for believing in you and me.

But the worst part is that I can't let go. I want to but I don't want to at the same time. So give me a reason to keep holding on. Give me some kind of sign that says that there is hope, there is a chance...One day. Just don't let me keep on waiting and waiting...even though I will.

Dette Er Carina

2010-08-02T00:40:00.002+02:00

Den nydelige jenten til høyre heter Carina! Hun er søt! Hun har vert i Indonesia!

I'll Make You Feel Unpretty Too

2010-07-31T17:32:00.003+02:00

I wish could tie you up in my shoes
Make you feel unpretty too
I was told I was beautiful
But what does that mean to you
Look into the mirror who's inside there
The one with the long hair
Same old me again today (yeah)

My outsides look cool
My insides are blue
Everytime I think I'm through
It's because of you
I've tried different ways
But it's all the same
At the end of the day
I have myself to blame
I'm just trippin'

You can buy your hair if it won't grow
You can fix your nose if he says so
You can buy all the make up
That M.A.C. can make
But if you can't look inside you
Find out who am I too
Be in the position to make me feel
So damn unpretty
I'll make you feel unpretty too

Never insecure until I met you
Now I'm bein' stupid
I used to be so cute to me
Just a little bit skinny
Why do I look to all these things
To keep you happy
Maybe get rid of you
And then I'll get back to me

My outsides look cool
My insides are blue
Everytime I think I'm through
It's because of you
I've tried different ways
But it's all the same
At the end of the day
I have myself to blame
I'm just trippin'

Hang With Me

2010-07-27T18:58:00.002+02:00

Will you tell me once again how we're gonna be just friends?
If you're for real and not pretend
then I guess you can hang with me

When my patience's wearing thin
When I'm ready to give in
Will you pick me up again?
Then I guess you can hang with me

And if you do me right
I'm gonna do right by you
And if you keep it tight
I'm gonna confide in you
I know what's on your mind
there will be time for that too
if you hang with me
hang with me

Just don't fall
recklessly, headlessly in love with me
Cause its gonna be
All heartbreak
blissfully painful and insanity
if we agree

Oh you can hang with me

When you see me drift astray
outta touch and outta place
will you tell me to my face?
then I guess you can hang with me

"Alenetid" er overvurdert!

2010-07-18T23:19:00.003+02:00

Jeg kom hjem i dag fra en av de beste helgene i mitt liv. Jeg og 3 av mine fineste venninner dro til Berlin Torsdag morgen, for å tilbringe en langhelg i denne fantastiske byen. Vi har hatt en utrolig morsom tur! Latter er nok stikkordet, sammen med shopping, alkohol og fantastisk uteliv! Skal definitivt tilbake til denne byen!

Nå når jeg er hjemme, føles det tomt å ikke ha 4 fantastiske jenter rundt meg 24/7!

Takk for en fantastisk tur, verdens beste!

Ja, jeg har verdens peneste venninner <3

"I'll always understand"

2010-07-14T12:46:00.002+02:00

This feeling that I thought would go away, it's still here. I can't be alone no more. When I'm alone, my thoughts start running and I can't take it. 'Cause all I want is to see you. Be with you. Listen to you breathe. The sound of your breath makes my mind stop running. It helps me relax. So I need you.

And now you've been gone to long. You said you would be back soon, but where are you? I need you here. Need to know that you're nearby. Just in case.
I finally thought I was in control, but I'm realizing that I have lost control, and I'm only stuck with uncertainty, and roller coaster emotions. Help me get of this carousel. I can't take my head spinning, my stomach twisting, and my heart racing any more.
I just want you.

Rock, Paper, Scissors

2010-07-13T10:52:00.003+02:00

I understand how scissors can beat paper. and I get how a rock can beat scissors, but there is no fucking way paper can beat rock. Is paper supposed to magically wrap around rock and leave it immobile? Why the hell can't paper do this to scissors? Screw scissors, why can't paper do this to people? Why aren't sheets of college ruled notebook paper constant suffocating students as they take notes in class? I'll tell you why, because paper can't beat anybody. A rock would tear that shit up in 2 seconds. When I play rock, paper, scissors, I always choose rock. Then when somebody claims to have beaten me with their paper, I can punch them in the face with my already clenched fist and say, oh shit I'm sorry, I though paper would protect you, you asshole!

She said; There just must be more to life than this

2010-07-08T12:50:00.002+02:00

Hey girl in the strobing light
What your mama never told ya
Is love hurts when you do it right
You can cry when you get older

Young boy by the traffic light
What your daddy never told ya
Is love hurts when you do it right
You can cry when you get older

Hold up a second, now I got something on my dirty mind
I start out with good intentions but mess it up like all the time
I try to keep up appearance but always end up way out of line
I need some kind of miracle, 'cause I lost all my faith in science
So I put my faith in me

She said:
There just must be more to life than this
He said:
Careful, 'cause you might just get your wish

I'm Fine

2010-07-07T14:59:00.002+02:00

Stop telling people you are fine. You aren't fine. You haven't been fine since you were a kid;you haven't been fine since you started piecing the world together. It's all quite a mess isn't it? Everyone seem to have lost sight of their own humanity. You haven't been fine since the first day that you felt powerless. You remember that day. You fell to the floor of your bedroom and cried for two days before anyone came looking for you. You were crying for the world that day, and you were crying the loss of your obliviousness. It is almost eight years since that day, and you might finally be ready, ready to help mend this place that has lost its ways. You will work everyday for the rest of your life, trying to be honest when you say, "I'm fine".

Torn

2010-06-28T12:13:00.001+02:00

I thought I saw a man brought to life
he was warm he came around like he was dignified
he showed me what it was to cry
Well you couldn't be that man I adored
you don't seem to know - or seem to care what your heart s for
I don't know him anymore
there's nothing where he used to lie
my conversation has run dry
that's what's goin' on
nothing's fine
I'm torn
I'm all out of faith, this is how I feel
I'm cold and I am shamed
lying naked on the floor
illusion never changed
into something real
I'm wide awake and I can see the perfect sky is torn
you're a little late
I'm already torn

so I guess the fortune teller's right
I should have seen just what was there and not some holy light
but you `crawled beneath my veins and now I don't care, I have
no luck
I don't miss it all that much
there's just so many things
that I can't touch
I'm torn
there's nothing where he used to lie
my inspiration has run dry
that's what's goin' on
nothing's right I'm torn...

Shout It From The Roof Top

2010-06-20T16:53:00.002+02:00

I remember years ago
Someone told me I should take
Caution when it comes to love
I did, I did
And you were strong and I was not
My illusion, my mistake
I was careless, I forgot
I did
And now when all is done
There is nothing to say
You have gone and so effortlessly
You have won
You can go ahead tell them

Tell them all I know now
Shout it from the roof top
Write it on the sky love
All we had is gone now
Tell them I was happy
And my heart is broken
All my scars are open
Tell them what I hoped would be
Impossible, impossible
Impossible, impossible

Falling out of love is hard
Falling for betrayal is worst
Broken trust and broken hearts
I know, I know
Thinking all you need is there
Building faith on love is worst
Empty promises will wear
I know (i know)
And know when all is gone
There is nothing to say
And if you're done with embarrassing me
On your own you can go ahead tell them

Tell them all I know now
Shout it from the roof top
Write it on the sky love
All we had is gone now
Tell them I was happy
And my heart is broken
All my scars are open
Tell them what I hoped would be
Impossible, impossible

I remember years ago
Someone told me I should take
Caution when it comes to love
I did

Dancing on my own...

2010-06-07T23:00:00.002+02:00

Somebody said you got a new friend
Does she love you better than I can?
Big black sky over my town
I know where you at, I bet she’s around
Yeah, I know it’s stupid
I just gotta see it for myself

I’m in the corner, watching you kiss her,
oh…
I’m right over here, why can’t you see me,
oh…
I’m giving it my all but I’m not the girl you’re taking home
o-o-oh…
I keep dancing on my own

I’m just gonna dance all night,
I’m all messed up, I’m so outta line
Stilettos and broken bottles,
I’m spinnin’ around in circles

I’m in the corner, watching you kiss her,
oh…
I’m right over here, why can’t you see me,
oh…
I’m giving it my all but I’m not the girl you’re taking home
o-o-oh…
I keep dancing on my own

So far away but still so near (the lights go on, the music dies)
But you don’t see me standing here (I just came to say goodbye)

I’m in the corner, watching you kiss her,
oh…
I’m giving it my all but I’m not the girl you’re taking home
o-o-oh…
I keep dancing on my own

I’m in the corner, watching you kiss her,
oh…
I’m right over here, why can’t you see me,
oh…
I’m giving it my all but I’m not the girl you’re taking home
o-o-oh…
I keep dancing on my own
(I keep dancing on my own…)

It's you, It has always been you

2010-06-03T13:17:00.002+02:00

My second favourite movie scene

2010-05-30T00:45:00.000+02:00

My Best Friend's Wedding

My favourite movie scene

2010-05-29T01:31:00.002+02:00

My Best Friend's Wedding

My favorite movie scene

2010-05-29T01:31:00.000+02:00

My Best Friend's Wedding

Just prayed to a God I don't believe in

2010-05-27T17:35:00.003+02:00

Today I got that feeling...again. I thought it had gone away for good, that I was done. Apparently not. I'm not gonna cry because it's over, I'm gonna smile because it happened. Or I will at least try.
I can't stop thinking; who is she? Do you like her? Does she like you? Do you like her more than me?
Please don't break my heart...again.

I'm still alive but I'm barely breathing, just prayed to a god that I don't believe in, 'Coz I got time while he got freedom,
'Coz when a heart breaks no it don't break even.

His best days will be some of my worst, when will I finally met a man that's gonna put me first,
But while I'm wide awake, he's got no trouble sleeping,

What am I supposed to do when the best part of me was always you. What am I supposed to say when I'm all choked up and you're ok. I'm falling to pieces.

They say bad things happen for a reason. But no wise words gonna stop the bleeding. 'Coz he's moved on while I'm still grieving. And when a heart breaks no it don't break even.

You got her heart and my heart and none of the pain, You took your suitcase, I took the blame.
Now I'm tryna make sense of what little remains, 'Coz you left me with no love, with no love to my name.